Live action Marvel movies have been dominating the box office for a long time now. It seems like the whole world is constantly salivating for another chance to see their favourite Marvel superheroes (and Hawkeye) on the big screen. Which I totally get, the movies are (for the most part) pretty great. While DC has put out the fantastic Batman films and an adequate Superman film in recent years, it remains a distant second behind Marvel when it comes to peddling that perfect mixture of sanitized family friendly violence, big name stars, CGI and superhero branding. On the animated feature film side of things though the situation is reversed. DC dominates that scene, while Marvel has put out more duds than gems. The big changes for Marvel within the comics and on the business side in the past decade have made their animated offerings feel like an afterthought.
I’m going to do you all a solid and tell you which of the Marvel animated feature films are worth watching, which are passable if you’re desperate and which ones you should absolutely avoid. I’m serious about avoiding watching the bad films. Seeing your favourite hero or villain in a terrible films kills a little part of you. Remember that sick feeling in your stomach every time Hayden Christensen was on screen playing Vader? It did not feel good did it? Don’t you wish at the very least someone could have just warned you ahead of time? Like maybe you could have brought a brown paper bag to breathe into until the scene was over? Anything to get you to that next CGI orgy of a light-show. But I digress.
The Best “Ahhh sweet! Is that Deadpool?” Films:
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- Hulk Vs
Probably the best animated feature Marvel has put out so far. Not that the bar is super high as this dual film (Hulk vs Wolverine and Hulk vs Thor) is no award winning masterpiece. What it does do exceptionally well is capture the essence of what makes its marquee stars so great. The animation and visual style suits the tone of the two films well. The cast all look great and the voice work is top notch.
In Hulk vs Wolverine we get to see a grizzled Wolverine, too tough to ever stay down, go toe to toe with the Hulk. The big green monster spends most of the film in full on rage mode. Banner makes only a brief appearance. Which is ok because we came to see a throw down between two of the toughest men Marvel has to offer, not get a lecture on how “real men don’t use violence to solve problems.” As an added bonus Hulk Vs Wolverine has the best depiction of Deadpool outside the pages of a comic to date. He literally steals every scene he is in. A number of foes from Wolverines old Weapon X days, including Omega Red, Lady Deathstrike and Sabertooth also make an appearance. The plot is not very deep because the Hulk in rage mode is not very deep. Hulk smash and people try to stop Hulk from smashing. The Hulk Vs films are pretty much just 40 min set pieces.
Hulk vs Thor has even less nuance than Hulk Vs Wolverine. Loki uses magic to bring Hulk to Asgard to kick the ever loving hell out of Thor. Only the Hulk cannot be controlled. Hilarity ensues. If you want to watch the Hulk pound on Thor’s pretty boy face for 40 minutes this is the film for you. Banner gets a little bit more screen time than in Hulk vs Wolverine, but the majority of the film is an even angrier the normal Hulk tearing Asgard apart. Good times.
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- Planet Hulk
This is the Hulks best appearance outside of a TV show. He talks in this one! Exiled to deep space by his Avenger “friends,” Hulk crash lands on the planet Sakaar. There he battles monsters in an alien gladiatorial arena and gets pulled into a rebellion against the world’s corrupt ruler. Unlike most of Hulk appearances in different shows and films, in this film we get to see a deeper Hulk. At first he just wants to be left alone. Because he feels like he has no place where he belongs; a place where he does not feel like a monster. There are a lot of great moments. Hulk throws down against Beta Ray Bill, which is so many kinds of awesome. He’s also the “chosen one” who the people of Sakaar hope will lead them to a brighter future. He even has a love interest! It may not be exactly the Planet Hulk comic book fans remember, but it is the best dedicated Hulk movie, live action or animated.
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- Doctor Strange: The Sorcerer Supreme
That this film even exists at all should be all the incentive you need to see it. The idea Doctor Strange would get his own full length animated feature film before so many other Marvel super stars is mind blowing. The fact the film is actually pretty good does not hurt either. In a world where we have seen Peter Parker become Spider-Man a million times and been subjected to flashbacks of Wolverine taking an adamantine bath a billion times, it was nice to see an origin story I had not seen in a film before. It did feel at times as if the creators knew they may never get another chance to let Doctor Strange shine so they packed a lot into one film. The movie starts with Strange as a cocky Doctor in love with his miracle working hands who then finds himself unable to use said hands, leaving him feeling impotent. Zing! They take him all the way from this low point to becoming the Sorcerer Supreme. It does a good job of establishing two of the good Doctors main foes, Mordo and Dormammu. The art and voice work are likewise strong. There are more than a few cliches to be found in the script and some of the fighting feels throw away. None of that matters though because Doctor Strange got his own freaking animated movie! Let’s hope Benedict Cumberbatch treats the Doctor as well.
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- Ultimate Avengers
Oh Ultimate Avengers, how I love your messy hodge-podge of a film. The Avengers band together to fight shape-shifting aliens. This version of the Avengers includes The Wasp and Giant Man, alongside the usual suspects; Captain America, Hulk, Iron Man, Black Widow and Thor. This movie is all over the place in terms of plot, pacing and coherence. There was nobody with a funny name like Joss keeping all the plates spinning at the same time. You get to see popular heroes beat up aliens and bond with one another. The art and voice acting are much better than the script they are attached to. Come for the set pieces battles, stay for the great Thor jokes.
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- Ultimate Avengers 2
The second film is pretty much the same as the first. Only this time Black Panther has joined the crew. If you enjoyed the first one you’ll probably enjoy this one. Its biggest selling point is Black Panther. He gets a lot of screen time which he takes full advantage of. Like the first this film is all over the place in terms of pacing and plot. Too many heroes and not enough cohesion outside of key moments.
The Barely Watchable “It’s 4am and I need something to watch while I eat cold pizza and drink the ice cream I forgot to put away.” Films:
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- Thor: Tales of Asgard
Do you want to see what Thor was like as a teenager? Ahh you know you do. What’s better than watching a prepubescent Thor riddled with teen angst? Well lots of things but the fact remains this film exists. Thor, Loki and the Warriors Three go to Yodenheim and get into some shit. Oh no what if their dad finds out?! This movie seems like it was truly aimed at children. Very slow, very bored children. It’s not good when the Warriors Three are more entertaining than Thor or Loki. Still it’s better than watching nothing at all, which is something.
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- Next Avengers: Heroes of Tomorrow
This movie could and should have been great, I love so much about the setup. The original Avengers are gone; Ultron has conquered the world. Only the children of the Avengers remain. Cap and Black widow have a son. Giant Man and Wasp had a male larvae of their own. Thor and Sif gave birth to an Olde English spouting tomboy of a daughter. Black Panther and Storm had a son as well. Hawkeye and Mockingbird had a son too because they are both named after birds and dems da rulez. Iron Man got no nooky and is instead left to be nurse maid to a bunch of super-powered brats. God only knows the life lessons a drunken womanizer and ego maniac taught them. The Hulk and Vision both make appearances as well. Basically it is up to these kids to save the world. Only the world is already gone. There are not enough people to repopulate. Of course that is what happens if you think too hard about anything. The art style is a bit more kiddy cartoon but that is ok as this is obviously aimed at youngsters. The voice cast is actually pretty entertaining. The thing is, Ultron smoked the original Avengers and took over the world. That these kids can take him down, and the way they end up going about it is just dumb. Watch this movie with a young child and you’ll be treated to the delightful sound of a 5 year old yelling “Oh come on!”
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- Avengers Confidential: Black Widow & Punisher
Marvel’s attempt at going gritty and mature. I like watching Punisher and Black Widow mow down waves of bad guys. That part of the film is fun. It’s when they start talking or the movie attempts to tell you a story it all goes out the window. It’s just bad. If it was a live action movie it would be the original Punisher from the 80’s with Dolph Lundgren. Only it thinks it is Dirty Laundry. Watch it if you want to see Punisher and Black Widow kill lots of people. That is the ONLY reason to watch.
The Worst “This is just bad. Everyone involved should feel bad. Go to your room and think about what you have done.” Films
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- The Invincible Iron Man
Ewwwwwww. Everything about this film is just wrong. A horribly mangled reworking of Iron Man’s origin story. A battle against a bunch of elemental magic beings you don’t care about and will soon forget. A love story that feels so phony and forced you almost feel like Tony is messing with the poor girl. This movie sucks as an origin story film. It sucks as just an Iron Man adventure. It double sucks for mentioning the Mandarin without any huge throw down.
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- Iron Man: Rise of Technovore
Anime and superheroes should work well together. Unfortunately nothing works in this piece of trash. Some cool visuals can’t hide the fact this movie feels like a caricature of a real Iron Man film. There’s lots of hollow, almost silly dialogue. Lots of meaningless nonsense that sounds just Tony Stark-ish enough to pass muster. Black Widow and Hawkeye at first chase and then help Iron Man fight Technovore, one of his most throw away villains. Punisher is also around for some reason. But even Hawkeye, whose talent for looking useful is unparalleled, could not save this wreck. No trick arrow that slightly irritates a bad guy while a real hero does the hard work could have saved this movie. Also what happens to War Machine will piss you off.
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- Iron Man & Captain America: Heroes United
Everything about this is terrible except the voice work. If you want to see the ugliest version of Captain America ever created this is the movie for you. The animation is ugly. Like a student project circa 1999. Even the inclusion of my beloved Taskmaster and the less interesting Red Skull could not save this film.
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- Iron Man & Hulk: Heroes United
No. Just no. This is Marvel trolling us all. Like Iron Man & Captain America: Heroes United, this is an ugly movie. And the main villain is Zzzax. Zzzax of all people! He’s not a main villain, stupid Marvel. He’s a warm up bad guy. The Abomination would have made more sense as the lead baddy but this film has none. This is the movie they play on a constant loop in hell for Marvel fans.
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At this point somebody is yelling “WHAT ABOUT BIG HERO 6?!!!” at their screen. Yes, Big Hero 6 is incredible. Everyone should see it without reservation. I simply did not count it in the main list as I consider it more of a Disney darling than a child of Marvel, even though Disney owns Marvel.
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So there you have it, a run-down of all Marvel’s animated feature films. Some are good, most are meh, and a couple are just terrible. If you enjoyed this piece keep an eye out for its DC counterpart in the coming weeks. That will probably take a lot longer as there are 31 movies to talk about, and unlike Marvel, most of those movies are good. That is not matter of me liking DC more than Marvel, simply that DC has made a larger number of quality animated films. If you have a different take on these films or want to take me to task, I welcome you to use your internet based super powers on our comments section.
PS: No matter how great Matt Fraction’s and Javier Pulido’s Hawkeye comic is, it does not change the fact on TV and in film Hawkeye sucks. Deal with it.
Tim
I got a boxset with the Ultimate Avengers 1+2, Invincible Iron Man and Dr Strange. I didn’t like Dr Strange as much as you (not bad but just okay) but otherwise think you nailed all of them. I also own Wolverine Vs Wolverine and have seen Planet Hulk, both of which I thought were good.
Despite you recommending the opposite, I may have to track down Avengers Confidential – “Watch it if you want to see Punisher and Black Widow kill lots of people. That is the ONLY reason to watch.” SOLD! = )